Breakups suck. There’s no doubt in the world about that. Especially when you’re the one being broken up with. Imagine this. You meet someone, you guys connect on so many different levels, you fall in love and somewhere in your head, you are already planning your future with that person right in the middle of it. Then out of the blue, they hit you with it- cold and raw. It’s over! The thing is whether or not they even give you a reason for their decision, bottom line is They are dumping you! And even if they are ‘kind’ enough to make some effort to let you down easy, you’re still gonna fall and get your heart broken. Period. And no, they don’t score extra points for playing nice.
That said, it’s bad enough you’re breaking up with me. At least that I can wrap my head around. Shit happens. But how you will now open your mouth and ask me to be friends, is way beyond me. Seriously! It’s not even so much about what they’re saying that’s so annoying but the ease with which they do. Why on earth would I want to be your friend? You just freaking dumped me! And before you start getting into the whole sermon of maturity, not wanting to be friends is not being childish. We’re cool yeah. But we are NOT FRIENDS.
I don’t even get how the whole friendship with the ex thing works. I fall in love with you, share my life with you, make memories with you and you one day decide that you no longer want ‘us’ then you’re stupid enough to add that “you still want us to be friends because you’ll always want to have me in your life.” Who cares what you want at this point really?
I think that asking to be ‘friends’ with someone you just broke up with is very selfish and insensitive. Probability that the person still loves you is really high (else they’d have dumped you earlier than you did them), and you just broke their heart. They need time to deal with the harsh reality of what just happened. They need time to get over you. They need time to heal. But the one thing they do not need for sure is your offer of friendship. You’re the enemy! Lol.
Ultimately, you both might get to a point of civility. You know that point where you don’t pray that he/she falls off a bridge and gets eaten by sharks anymore but you don’t particularly pray for them to find their happily ever after either. I personally think that’s your best bet. Friendship? I think that’s a bit farfetched. Except you were never in love in the first place.
What are your thoughts? Is it possible to genuinely be friends with an ex? Especially one who broke your heart?