Okay before you read this, just a quick one, I’m not a writer. She basically had to threaten me to get this piece. *deep sigh* Now here goes…
2014 was one year I can’t forget. It was one year I faced enough challenges and setbacks to completely overwhelm me. So as you can imagine, any prayer attached to the New Year was met with a resounding “Amen”. By this time last year, I was so excited to see the New Year based on the plans I had written down. If 2015 could talk, pretty sure it would have laughed right in my face.
This year mehn… it has been nothing short of a terrifying roller coaster ride. Honestly, I’m just grateful to God that I’m alive and well in spite of all. I don’t think I can ever stress how difficult this year was for me. Whenever I do a mental throwback, I find myself wondering why I haven’t had a nervous breakdown. One more reason to thank God. The start of the year meant a new position in fellowship, a pretty big one at that. So naturally, I was scared and terrified. After a few months, chai! I was ready to throw in the towel but digging deeper, I found the strength to put my fears behind me.
I turned 21 on July 21st. Yeah I know, how cool is that? Been looking forward to that for years now but on that day, not a lot of celebration went down because I had exams coming. I still tried to make the best of it anyway.
Another highlight was the month of September. Gosh! It was hell! The results of the exams I read so much for were released around mid-September and I failed. I could neither cry or laugh. I was numb. The kind of numbness that lasted for weeks. I wasn’t able to pray or do anything tangible with my life because I just couldn’t understand how on earth I failed. As expected, people offered words of encouragement, most of which just bounced right back off me. My mind felt like a mismatched set of jigsaw puzzles where no 2 pieces could match but still I remained calm and God just came through. He caused the wrong pieces to fade away just for me to see the bigger picture that has always been with me.
Some of the other things that stood out for me were the Worthship concert in LUTH and the Night Of Worship at Victoria Island. Those were real heaven on earth moments where I worshipped with reckless abandon withholding nothing and it was A W E S O M E.
Toward the end of 2014, my relationship of over 2 years ended. I felt sad and angry. For the most part, I blamed myself for messing things up. I might have not been the best boyfriend but this year I discovered the reason why it had to happen and that just made things a lot easier to deal with. And now, although I’m not in another relationship yet, I have these amazing set of friends. They are just incredible (and annoying) in their different ways and I love them all! (Yeah you know yourselves).
Basically in 2015, I’ve learnt not to put myself first but God. A line from a song goes “I can play the background and you should take the lead.” Try doing things without God, it will only get you so far but putting God first just opens up an unchartered path where you can blaze a trail for the whole world to see.
Maybe we’ll see again or maybe we won’t *shrugs* Who knows what the future holds? Oh yeah, the Big guy upstairs does! Gotta go gist with him now. See you guys in 2016. Happy New Year in advance!